To the One Whose Hope is Deferred

In a gurney stretching...stretching...stretching... with no answer or room for hope. My soul is weak, my body grows tired, and hope is constantly being deferred.

I don't understand Your ways, nor do I comprehend the curves of Your path. I can't trust my feelings, because they only know how to send off panic alarms and anxiety-filled messages.

The world offers no grace for me, no second chances, no do-overs; just a single opportunity. If you miss it, well, shame on you for not trying hard enough or being prepared in an instant. I honestly don't know when another will come by.

But with each break of day I have a growing choice; to listen to the Voice that speaks quieter than the rest of the world, or let anxiety well up and tie me down in an iron suit of worry. If that is the road I take, it will claim every last inch of peace and dignity I possess.

So today, in the midst of trials and impending questions, what will I choose? The iron clamp of worry or the fresh coating of peace? I will tell you once the sun sets, for this decision will dictate the course of the day.

"For the Lord is a sun and shield; the Lord bestows favor and honor; no good thing does he with hold from those whose walk is blameless. O Lord Almighty, blessed is the man who trusts in you."

Psalm 84:11-12

Ode to the Muffin Club

This post is from a couple of weeks back. Apologizes for the wait!

This morning’s blanketed skies and blustery wind served as a stark contrast to last night’s shoulder-to-shoulder warmth. Last night promptly at 7pm a new coffee shop named “Headquarters” opened it’s doors and welcomed the scarf wearing crew of Sylvan Park. I had just been introduced to the wonders of this neighborhood, and was curious to check out its character and charm. Earlier that same day, I came to my friend’s house for her weekly neighborhood tradition, Muffin Fridays, where I first heard about the new coffee house opening. As a lover of tradition and all things sweet, of course I was 100% in for this venture.

That morning, I woke up before the sun and made my way to my friend’s home across town. After hours of baking, glazing, and tasting, our butterscotch rolls were ready for the gaggle of neighborhood women. Steamy cups of coffee and tired smiles met each person as I sat around the table of new friends.

The morning hours lazily droned on as one by one each young woman was sucked into the foreboding chasm called work. A small handful went cheerfully, while most seemed to back out slowly with a cold coffee mug still in hand. Still on the job-hunt myself, I lingered a bit, helped clean up the extra stickiness and helped with a small corner of my friend’s giant puzzle.

The day seemed to float on and night suddenly came like a surprise evening guest. That same gaggle of women from before re-gathered one by one at the opening of the vertically shaped coffee house. Once again, we huddled around warm cups of coffee and discussed the day’s affairs as if eons had gone by since our muffin meeting.

The day was ending just as it began: chatting with new friends while eating sweets and warming our hands with hot mugs. Great way to start a weekend. 

Walking on Gold

This weekend I joined two of my closest Nashville friends for an afternoon hike. The day started with chocolate chip pancakes on my back porch, so obviously a nature walk was the next logical step. We journeyed to the closest lake and walking trail, Radnor Lake (please excuse the poor website presentation. Hey Radnor, need a marketing person?).

We walked, shot photos, told stories, and stood in awe. We journeyed off the trail a bit and landed on a purely Narnian patch of earth. I’m pretty sure if C.S. Lewis new about this particular gem of a location he would have sent Digory and Polly there in The Magician's Nephew. It definitely would have been in one of their magic pools.

We walked up the trail and around a bend in the road to a lone bench. It was a small bench; low to the ground and just big enough for the three of us. We took a moment to sit and look up at the trees. It was about 1 p.m., and the sun was just at the right point in the sky to hit the leaves and produce a golden glow. The ground was covered with soft, delicate leaves, thick enough to look like a hand-made blanket.

We sat silently for a minute and just listened to the rustle of the leaves. Suddenly and slowly at the same time, a gust of wind came through the trees and scattered leaved all around us. All of a sudden it was snowing. Leaf by leaf twirled and prances from the tops of the trees to the ground below. The sun warmed our backs as the trees gifted us with their best bounty.

We put down our phones, quieted our worries, and listened for a moment for God’s gentle whisper.

You are not alone. I keep the storehouses of snow and tell each leaf where to fall (Job 38:22). I brought the glory of this day to you and I will continue to bring my glory to your life. Trust my paths, my ways, and my sovereignty. For now, let the glory of this moment be the grace you need to continue your journey.

God is the author of romance (John 3:16). Listen to his poems and see his beauty in the small moments. 

The Art of Pursuit (This is Not a Post About Romance)

I strongly believe that the art of pursuit has been lost among my generation. We have so many options and so many things grappling for our attention that we naturally assume the world is about us and what we want. So we cater to that craving. We attend the gatherings that are best suited for our schedules, invite the people who get along with us best, and conveniently forget about the people on the outskirts.

They might not ‘gel’ with the group.

I don’t think we’ll have enough food if we invite X, Y, and Z.

If I pursue this business venture, it means I will have to work extra hours.

That’s right, it happens in business too. We start adding up the extra hours to our already packed schedules and decide (before we even try it) that networking with this person will just be too much.

Before we know it, we’re hanging out with the exact same friends, at the same coffee shop, and repeating the same business methods every day. You know what? That gets boring, and kind of lonely (well, lonely for the new girl at work or the young guy with the startup company).

Is this rubbing you the wrong way? I hope so. Over the past several years I have met and cultivated relationships with people from all over the globe, and have noticed a common trend: people are forgetting how to pursue. People are becoming more introspective and hiding behind their cheesy photos of a lone coffee mug on Instagram. To this I say, “Shame on Us.” 

Why are young girls running to schmuckey guys at the bars and men running to the next adult video store? Because there is an underlying theme of rejection and we are helping encourage that lie. I firmly believe if we took a few extra minutes a day and searched out the people who seem friendless, alone, and not a ‘part of the group,’ we would see a large generational shift in terms of acceptance. There would be less people drowning their sorrows in wine [alone] on a Saturday night and more people getting to know someone of a different background or upbringing. 

Over the next couple of week I will be writing a mini-series on the Art of Pursuit. Giving tips, sharing success stories, and helping our generation see the importance of pursuing people – in all forms: through friendship, romantically, and professionally. 

What do you think? Does this interest you in the least bit? Do you agree or disagree with me? 

The Craft of Writing

I spent most of my younger years believing that good writers simply woke up one day and poof! They were excellent writers. I thought they had a sixth sense; the sense of excellent writing and storytelling. As I've grown up and journeyed into the professional arena of writing, I’ve found that I am utterly and completely wrong.

It is true that some people have a natural talent to pen creative words on paper, but most of the successful writers of today are bondservants to practice. This jabbed a bit at childhood version of Jessica who thought quiet corners of cabins with smoky fires brought forth brilliant writings. You could easily find pre-teen me laying on my bedroom floor writing on a giant yellow legal pad about faraway lands or great adventures. My naivety lead me to believe that because I simply had ideas, one day I would be praised and honored from them. The yellow legal pad would be found in museums, and I would be crafting the art of my signature instead of good writing.  

To my surprise and shock, those stories on the legal pad did not end up on the New York Times Best Seller List.

They ended up in boxes or stuffed in bedside table drawers – never to be read by anyone else besides my mother. I thought the creative descriptions and a heartfelt effort would accelerate me to the top. Fast forward 15 years and I’ve learned that possessing a knack for something does not make you a professional, hour upon hours of practice does.

The weight of this lesson hit me hard when I was on The World Race and writing about unbelievable stories of God’s goodness with very few people reading them. It wasn’t because the content was lacking, it was simply because I was out of practice. So I focused, honed in, and got to work.

Since then I’ve developed a personal brand, as well as increased my professional experience in public relations and online writing. Here are some principles I’ve adopted and people I’ve followed on this writing journey:

1.   Read. This is the best advice I can give to any writer. When you are searching for your brand identity as a writer, see what the pros are doing. Follow professionals who you respect and learn from their mistakes and victories. This will also give you a great opportunity to see what type of writing style you prefer. I recommend Michael Hyatt, Jeff Goins, and John Saddington for writing tips, publishing, and blogging advice. For inspiration and an incredible storyteller to learn from, read some of C.S. Lewis’ works (@CSLewisDaily).

2.   Experience.  You can’t effectively engage people in your writing unless you are experiencing something new each day. Ride a bike, eat something new, or meet your neighbor, then write about it. A blogger mentor of mine wrote a great post on this very thing. The colors of the new fall leaves are much more inspiring than the glow of your computer screen.

3.   Learn. Always ask. As a writer, you should train yourself to investigate. Where is your new friend from? How did Michael Hyatt establish such a huge tribe of followers? Who does a red coffee bean turn into that thick, syrupy wake-up treat? Nowadays people are much more interested in the unusual than the day-to-day. Find a new way to intrigue and engage them.

4.   Write. Jeff Goins blogs constantly about this importance of writing and publishing your work. Your writing will never be perfect. There is no such thing. But you will never be good at your craft if you do not schedule yourself to practice consistently. Be ruthless with your practicing rule; no one is going to make you write, you have to do it yourself. 

I hope this encourages and inspires you today. You are not alone my friend! There are writers everywhere hoping to learn from what you create and be inspired by your thoughts. Focus. Hone in. Get to work. 

Dusty Books

Old, dusty books inspire me. I feel like they have a lot of wisdom and secret knowledge hidden between the pages. It seems the secret knowledge can only be uncovered in the quietness of a bookstore or a secluded library. This past Saturday afternoon I found myself tucked away in the corners of a bookstore, surrounded by books bursting to share their stories. I turned down the alluring offer of a chili cook off to pursue a day in solitude, thinking it would help calm my anxiety. I am still on the job hunt, and each day last week seemed to heap a new load of burdens. The books helped, but they didn’t console the deep need in my heart.

I laid on an old-fashioned ottoman covered in fabric that looked like it belonged in the parlor from the game Clue. I pulled out The Last Battle by C.S. Lewis and began at chapter one. It was pocket-sized and the pages felt like the chapter books I used to read in elementary school (the time when reading a ‘chapter book’ was the right of passage into 3^rd grade). The more I tried to get lost in the adventures of Puzzle and Shift, the more distracted I became by the weight of my own anxieties. I couldn’t step into the story and enjoy someone else’s adventure because I wasn’t satisfied with my own. Ouch.

Dissatisfied, I drove grumpily home. I began to let fear dictate my mood, and it seemed that nothing could change it. My roommate’s cheerful attitude couldn’t shake it, and the freshly baked snicker doodles couldn’t suppress the edge in my tone. Even the warm faces of my friends coming over for movie night didn’t ease my stressed out mind. There I was – hospitable, but not warm. I wasn’t myself.

I went to bed, with glass half empty, and a poor outlook on my circumstances. Luckily the Lord has grace in times like this, you know?

The next day, surprisingly, I felt a new sense of hope and joy. Something had changed, and I felt like the Lord was about to move. I went through the motions of the day – church and fellowship with friends – but with a new outlook. It was almost like all of those prayers about increasing my faith were starting to seep into my beliefs. My thoughts were changing, and the verses about faith without seeing began to take a solid foundation in my mind. I was no longer desperately crying out to a faraway God to please, please provide for me; I was standing in belief that he will provide for me.

And my prayers began to change. My conversations began to change. My outlook began to change. It all made sense. All of the weeks I have been pouring over the word of God and praying feverishly for Him to answer my call came to a head, and He moved. He moved in my heart and He moved in my spirit. Suddenly these scriptures settled in my heart:

Doing the will of God will silence the ignorant talk of foolish men. (1 Peter 2:15)

Blessings come to those who trust in the Lord. (Jeremiah 17:7-8)

We do not live by sight! (2 Corinthians 5:7)

God rewards those who earnestly seek Him. (Hebrews 11:6)

It didn’t matter how much wisdom or insight poured out of those dusty books that day, it was another book that changed my heart. Take heart my friends, if you are going through trials or running after a dream. His rewards are coming for those who earnestly seek him.