The Art of Pursuit (This is Not a Post About Romance)

I strongly believe that the art of pursuit has been lost among my generation. We have so many options and so many things grappling for our attention that we naturally assume the world is about us and what we want. So we cater to that craving. We attend the gatherings that are best suited for our schedules, invite the people who get along with us best, and conveniently forget about the people on the outskirts.

They might not ‘gel’ with the group.

I don’t think we’ll have enough food if we invite X, Y, and Z.

If I pursue this business venture, it means I will have to work extra hours.

That’s right, it happens in business too. We start adding up the extra hours to our already packed schedules and decide (before we even try it) that networking with this person will just be too much.

Before we know it, we’re hanging out with the exact same friends, at the same coffee shop, and repeating the same business methods every day. You know what? That gets boring, and kind of lonely (well, lonely for the new girl at work or the young guy with the startup company).

Is this rubbing you the wrong way? I hope so. Over the past several years I have met and cultivated relationships with people from all over the globe, and have noticed a common trend: people are forgetting how to pursue. People are becoming more introspective and hiding behind their cheesy photos of a lone coffee mug on Instagram. To this I say, “Shame on Us.” 

Why are young girls running to schmuckey guys at the bars and men running to the next adult video store? Because there is an underlying theme of rejection and we are helping encourage that lie. I firmly believe if we took a few extra minutes a day and searched out the people who seem friendless, alone, and not a ‘part of the group,’ we would see a large generational shift in terms of acceptance. There would be less people drowning their sorrows in wine [alone] on a Saturday night and more people getting to know someone of a different background or upbringing. 

Over the next couple of week I will be writing a mini-series on the Art of Pursuit. Giving tips, sharing success stories, and helping our generation see the importance of pursuing people – in all forms: through friendship, romantically, and professionally. 

What do you think? Does this interest you in the least bit? Do you agree or disagree with me?